17 May 2015

My problem with non-hijabis..

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In my 6 years experience of being a hijabi and blogging about hijab there are certain things that I have learnt, some good, some bad. One of the worst things I've realised is that there seems to be this theme with many non-hijabi girls - their negative attitudes towards Muslim girls who choose to adopt the hijab.

I came across a YouTube comment the other day from a non-hijabi Muslim girl reading 'any girl who wears the hijab in England is a hypocrite and a slut'. Upon questioning her, she said that she thinks that girls should not wear the hijab if they are going to 'have boyfriends and have sex' (which she weirdly seems to have assumed every hijabi girl does..) because they are not good role models and that they only wear headscarves because they are made to at a young age. She claims to know every hijabi in England but she definitely doesn't know me and she doesn't know any hijabi girls that I know. And to add insult to injury she was commenting on a MARRIED hijabi girl's channel. These accusations are extremely haram not to mention generally disrespectful.

But surprisingly enough, this is not the only occasion I have heard this twisted perspective on hijabis. An old non-hijabi friend of mine once told me that she thinks she's better than most hijabi girls out there because she doesn't smoke shisha and doesn't have a boyfriend. I thought this was very funny because the vast majority of hijabis I know including myself do not, nor have they ever had, a boyfriend. And shisha is not haram so why exactly that made her better than a hijabi I'll never know. 

Yet another girl once proudly proclaimed that her father forbade her from wearing a hijab because hijabis are all bad and dress badly. Her smug, 'I am so much better than you' attitude really sickened me. She did not appear to be religious in any way, did not have a single Muslim friend and was overall quite a rude person, but apparently she was better than all of us headscarf-wearing Muslims. 

I have heard many a time non-hijabi girls try and justify the fact that they don't wear the hijab by proclaiming that hijabis do all these terrible things which they don't do therefore it doesn't matter that they do not follow that particular ruling in Islam. For me it is EXACTLY like saying, well look at all these Muslims that consistently pray but also lie, at least I don't lie so it's not as bad that I don't pray everyday. There is nothing logical about that statement. All it is is someone comparing themselves to someone else to try and make themselves feel and look better. Let us not forget the first person that compared. 

When I was a non-hijabi I must admit that at times I had similar thoughts but when I really reflected I realised that I was simply trying to justify not doing something that Allah (SWT) has told me to do. If non-hijabis truly care about how religious they are I think they would come to this realisation. 

As a final thought, I think that one action does not negate another because Allah (SWT) is All Merciful and accepts all of our deeds done with good intentions. If a hijabi does sin that does not mean her hijab is pointless, it simply means that she is a human being and sins like everyone else, but she is also trying to be a good Muslim by following one of the commands of Allah (SWT). Contrary to what the YouTube commenter claimed, if the hijabi is in a Western country she is constantly struggling even more given the current view of Islam. This makes her better than the non-hijabi any day of the week. 

xoxo

5 comments:

Nai @ TPJ said...

Ah. All bullies are cowards.
^_^
Nice one, there! Food for thoughts, I'd say.

StylishMuslimah said...

Nai, too right! xx

Zahra Tea said...

SubhanaAllah this is so true, I'm glad you wrote about this problem because I often notice this a lot on social media.

May Allah keep us all under his guidance.

(zahrasadventures.blogspot.co.uk)

StylishMuslimah said...

Zahra: I know right! Ameen :)

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